after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
Yeah bunch of crazy shit... Makes you wonder how anyone found someone before tinder
You have set the bar insurmountably high with apple pie and buttsex.
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
Brah, we should get a "do not disturb sign"... I can't have people knocking on the door while I'm high, it fucks with me way too much.
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
Well this guy just went into a detailed lecture about how rinos are developing into unicorns.. It's gonna be a good night.
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize
