guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
Here's the "to do" list i just found on my phone: buy stripper pole, make sex playlist, buy febreeze
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
Randomize
