How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
I woke up naked in my living room and my mom was next to me like we need to talk
You were so drunk that you were trying to take pictures of a MILF at the park so you could send them to Adam, but you didn't want to "seem creepy," so you used taking pictures of her son as a cover. Needless to say, cops were called.
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
At the hospital. Forgot we locked Eric out of the house last night as a joke. Hypothermia's a bitch.
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
I licked your asshole in confidence.
Well I just had a flashback of something I did in the 4th grade. Now I can't go back to sleep.
Randomize