I don't think brook has ever known best
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
Why did 20 jello shots in a row sound like a good idea last night?
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
playing nyquil roulette. it entails taking shots of nyquil and hoping it doesnt kick in during sex or in public. game on.
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
I convinced a German girl that I was born while my mom was water skiing and I preceded to barefoot ski behind her via the umbilical cord...
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
Randomize
