If I could pick any std, I would pick genital herpes. Seriously. Have you seen the commercials? The lady is riding a fucking bike, swimming, and on a date. I have a perfectly fine vag and all I do is go to the library.
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
Sorry if that was awkward, i will never call you sober ever again
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
