And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
She got subburned last week and her bikini ties in the middle...when I took off her shirt, there was a sunburned bow between her boobs. Like a present. Happy birthday to me!
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
You blacked out and walked in on my neighbor breast feeding at 3am yelling "where is my best friend". I think we should go apologize.
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
Apparently she hired a private investigator when he took out a restraining order on her. So the answer is no, I didn't hit it.
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
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