if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
I woke up face first on my living room floor arms outstretched toward the christmas tree
just found my calculator watch from 6th grade. the hipster transformation is complete
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
Fuuuuck. Forgot it's October. FYI scarecrows are gonna fuck you up when you're driving high
i just had to use the keg as a stool to reach the margarita maker. i'm such a problem solver.
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
I ordered more beers for everyone but had to finish them all. I promptly went outside and projectile vomited in the street. Three times.
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
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