I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
at a bar with my ex girlfriend.. both men AND WOMEN are hitting on her.. and not one has even looked at me
You know that it's no longer pregaming if you don't go anywhere, right? That's just drinking alone.
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
My roommate didn't flush after her miscarriage. Time to drink myself blind. I need you for moral support. Or so I don't have to drunkenly cry alone anymore. Whatever, help.
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
This isn't just a hangover. I can feel the blood moving through my veins, and it hurts.
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
I'm 2 beers deep on an empty stomach, and I just wanna say, I pride myself on my use of commas
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
Also I just took the BEST ass selfie of my adult life.... it's gonna be a good day haha
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
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