Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
An open call to all exes! i have a drunk text policy that requires i delete any and all texts after drink 3, however i have reason to believe i have done something stupid. if i have texted you that "I love you", "miss you" and/or conveyed any interest in getting back together with you in the last 24 hours i was belligerent and lying. That is all.
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
Tried to land my foot on his shoulder and kicked him in the face. Then I fell into a homeless man's bike and posed with a buffalo head. How was your night?
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
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