Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
arnt you supposed to become a mature adult when you move out of your parents house?
Moving out doesnt mean I'm mature, it means I can make pancakes and bacon at 3 in the morning and no one can judge me.
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
So I just watched a seagul attack my boss and steal his food in the parking lot. Today might not be a bad day lmfao.
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
Well that's very sweet of you. I have a strange feeling you're going to regret this when you sober up.
NO REGRETS FUCK DA POLICE
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
Randomize
