i literally forgot his name and just started calling him "waffles"
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
His idea of romance is drunkenly leaving me dead dandelions on my car in the middle of the night
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
I'm wearing a shirt that says "birthday girls #1 homo" ...what has my life come to?
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
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