Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
We ended up at an Asian frat. I made out with two Mexicans at the same time and I pulled a muscle in my leg from twerking too low. Diversity.
You didn't try to help me when I fell on the dance floor. She brought me cupcakes. You're a shitty friend, suck your own dick.
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
Where's the chopping off someone's balls emoji
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
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