you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
I'd apply for another job, but "staring out windows crying" is not a hot qualification right now.
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
Randomize
