but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
where are my pants?
you were passing out with two blankets and the person next to you was cold so you gave him your pants to keep warm
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
Wow. This hand sanitizer smells awesome. It's like I just gave a handjob to a fruit basket.
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
i want to go make food but i'll have to face my mom after telling her that the random i'm sleeping with, whose name i don't know, told me I was "too slutty to be his girlfriend" when i was drunk last night
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
After you finished the $300 bottle of wine you just started crying about how if Mulder and Scully didn't invite you to join the x-files your life would be meaningless because you "love that weird shit"
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
Randomize