I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
just saw a midget ride a motorized cooler into the liquor store. i'm gonna follow him home.
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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