Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
FYI don't ever, ever get a lap dance from a stripper who says " she's having a bad day " at a bachelor party.
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
I can hear my liver begging me not to go out tonight
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
Randomize
