How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
I made a vision board specifically for the purpose of boning john mayer.
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
I should have considered my snorting capabilities before breaking my nose
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
I don't know what part of my sober brain thought it was a good idea to get stoned when I can barely walk with crutches as it is, but that part is stupid.
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
Randomize
