is your mom at the bar?
I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
After I saw you grinding on that guy with your shirt completely unbuttoned, I figured it was time for pizza.
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
Randomize
