i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
I'm basically your average "grandpa stuck in a 28 year old woman's body" - i'm super passionate about retirement and crossing on the walk signal.
and SLEEP god I love sleep
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
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