I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
You're not invited to the wedding. They don't want you starting a "who's fucked the bride the most" contest.
Turned out the thing on the lampshade was a bloodstain, not a bedbug. We feel much safer now.
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
Happy Birhtday!
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
Randomize
