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Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
I'm hiding out in the living room until he falls back asleep. If he catches a whiff of my tits, it's all over. I just need to play it cool. Babies can smell fear
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
More importantly this is sex weather and i am striking out
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
bullshit you weren't drunk, you pointed at me and said my cigarette was empty
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
He's a waste of a perfectly good penis.
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
Randomize
