Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
possible new low: just washed a permanent marker penis off my cheek with porta-potty hand sanitizer.
also if this is gonna be a sample of how country jam will be, I might as well break up with him now. he spent the night blacked out and I could have been in a three-some.
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
Why is there a condom in my ukulele?
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