shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
I thought it was your cat but I was wrong your Roomba is possessed by a pissed-off evil spirit.
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