His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
I just used a franzia box to scrape the snow off my car.
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
Randomize
