We played Rock, Paper, Scissors last night to see who was the least drunk to drive.
The Rock won.
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
Please come and rip my uterus out before it does it itself
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize
