Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
In retrospect pumpkin carving while drinking Patron was a bad idea.
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
Randomize
