The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
Somehow ended up at a stranger's bridal shower. Everyone else is already drunk.
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
We were playing hot potato with real potatoes at 3am
Liz is crying about burritos again.
You called me to pick you up from the bar at 9:00. When we drove over the speed bumps you put your hands in the air and pretended you were on a roller coaster.
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
You're 31, how do you still outdrink all these college kids?
Practice, Irish genes, and a lack of desire to live past 40. But mostly practice.
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
It's sad that I'm more proud of my Twitter account then my resume
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