I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
It was awkward being the only one at the wedding who knows that the bride and groom met when she gave him a lap dance at a strip club
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
I literally just skipped to the fridge when I realized we had enough vodka left to get day drunk
So I got this new job… ever been fucked in a corner office before?
How do I explain to work that I woke up in my underwear on a trampoline and that I'm not coming in?
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
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