everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
Your couch is like an animal shelter for stray drunks.
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
this place is dumb. no one understands my Sunday morning alcoholism here.
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
Randomize
