Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
I knew you were drunk when you poured scotch on a croissant and ate it.
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
Guess who used an inflatable mattress to boat across a retention pond with brooms for oars and a radio and beer.
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
Randomize
