Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
im gonna make a bucket list just so i can cross off "underwater blowjob"
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry
You asked me to text you at 11 and remind you that he's 33. It's 11:20. He's 33.
you're too late. he has eggnog and whiskey and all seven seasons of buffy. I shan't be coming home tonight
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
I could fuck to npr.
I still have a little drunk in my system
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
Randomize
