Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
it was only during my walk of shame that i realized i was wearing the exact same outfit that julia roberts wears on the dvd cover or pretty woman. prostitution is my destiny.
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
Note to self: Do not bring gift bag with cock ring inside to family Christmas. Leave to unwrap at home.
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
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