Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
I might be the strongest willed bouncer ever. Earlier tonight a girl flashed me trying to get in. I just replied "Sorry I'm gay", she believed me and left.
I just jerked off in front of my dog to make him jealous of my thumbs. There are consequences for stealing the last cheeto!
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
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