Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
I just couldn't load the family groceries on to the same seat where I had sex 12 hours ago.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
Just used my flashlight app to find a gummy lifesaver I dropped on the floor
I like how you're utilizing your resources
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
Then you got drunk and shit in her car. Nothing before that matters. She isn’t calling you back.
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
Randomize
