the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
URGENT INPUT I'm at a renesance fair after party and I'm 100% lined up to fuck their sword swallower OR their contortionist. Dont say both - which direction doth I roll?
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
Randomize
