No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
I just want to make out with him forever
I wish I had a Tina from Bob's Burgers in real life. She would be the best wingman.
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
Did you clean my apartment?
I thought it was a dream, I'm sorry
Please stay more often
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