That chick was all over your bacon last night, grinding on you, I thought you were going to bang her in the club
Dude it was a lap dance
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
Don't pass out before midnight like you did last year. See how much your year sucked
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
HEAR YE, HEAR YE! BY ROYAL DECREE, I WILL BE KNOCKING ON YOUR DOOR AT 2PM UNLESS YOU GET THE FUCK UP. IT'S 1:50. CIGARETTE TIME, BITCH. I LOVE YOU.
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
Worst. Date. Ever. He peeled a layer of bread off his mini burger buns because they had "too many carbs".
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
Randomize
