Reggie can tackle my bush.
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
I could've eaten a live cat and wouldn't remember it today. That level of drunk.
Dude I live in a fucking closet and still get laid every weekend. Figure it out.
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
We smell like vodka and hangover
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
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