So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
There's gotta be a happy medium between the guys who only want to sleep with me and the ones that respect me too much to try to sleep with me.
I just found scrambled eggs in my shower. Thanks for that, asshole.
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
Oh damn it. Let me get a beer. I can't take anymore bad news. Hold on.
Just found an airplane bottle of whiskey and I didn't put it in my coffee. I think I deserve a little recognition this morning.
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
Randomize
