I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
The guy at the Apple store said the warranty does NOT cover getting cum out of the keyboard. I can't believe I believed you.
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
I told the emergency room nurse I didn't want to stop and ruin the moment. She said safewords are there for a reason. Super condescending. Got her number though.
Turns out it's a fake number.
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
Btw I definitely had pizza sauce on my face, a painful hickey on my neck, and I just remember screaming SISTER WIVES because of the girl's 1997 jean skirt! Wow.
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
Randomize
