also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
I'm either too drunk or not bisexual anymore
On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
Mike and I just ate the lobster we found in the toilet
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
no jill really. Evrything around me is talking to me. The plant, my dog, the tv,the lamp. Its amazing.
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
He made me chicken tenders and margaritas in preparation for me to take a pregnancy test at his place later tonight. Like...seriously.
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
Crop dusting thru forever 21
Randomize
