oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
I think a homeless person took a bath in my mouth while I was sleeping :(
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
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