i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
She just kept tellin me God was coming back and he was leavin her with a bag of stale doritoes and shitty friends.
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
He drops f bombs like every other word and he just gave me 127 shares of tmobile stock for free. I feel like I should pay him back in blow jobs or something.
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhh”
Randomize
