hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
Dad just asked me to breathalyze grandma
Of course I have a pirate flag
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
Excuse you? I'm an asshole at least 90% of the time. Get it right.
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
A guy I don't even know just ate me out on a washing machine at a random persons afterparty. I came as it was going through spin cycle.Just kept thinking "who does laundry during a party?"
Randomize
