sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
explaining to a nurse how i all most cut my finger off playing beer pong, she def just hand me a AA booklet.
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
Wanna get business drunk and go play golf?
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
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