Food network will be on but we won't be watching
O by "watching" I mean "background noise"
The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
Vibrator and massage oils got stopped at security. Super.
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
Ok John needs to move to the other side of the county. I do not like to be approached for a blow job in the produce section of Holiday Market.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
Just puked in a cup. Poured it out the window.
I asked him to get me another beer, and he started making muffins.
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
Randomize
