carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
Waking and baking in my bathtub. In a giant sweater. And no pants. This is going to be the best 420 ever.
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
By the time we got to McDonald's you were sharing a Big Mac with a stripper.
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
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