i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
overheard a conversation between 2 lesbians: 'back when I used to have dick sex...' oh, vegas, I so heart you
We need to talk about our relationship.
I just won a bet involving 10 tequila shots. You've got about 3 minutes
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
My goal for the weekend: procure a blowjob using only stern glances, hand gestures, and crudely-drawn stick figures.
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
Randomize