Got home from the bar at 4am. 100% sober, unlaid. Epic fail or responsible behavior?
Responsible fail?
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
new plan: i think the keg will fit in my purse.
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
I just overheard an "I'm going to get your dick so hard" conversation at Costco.
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
Will exercising make me less horny?
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
Randomize