found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
Bring fortys. we have the duct tape. its onnn mothafuckaaaa
Ok I am NOT pregnant. I could shove coal up my vagina and my uterus would turn it into a diamond in a matter of minutes
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
Randomize
