id be glad to
Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
My mom made me chili for when I get home from the bar. Those are the standards I expect you to live up to
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
he's gonorrhea incarnate
I peed on his girlfriend's loofah during our post-sex shower.
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
Hey, sorry for threatening to teabag your mom to death last night
Sometimes, being an adult means buying a bottle of whiskey after work and live tweeting the commercial breaks on food network.
Randomize