I bet he comes in French.
yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
so this guy on craigslist is offering a case of beer to shave his back. i think i'm gonna take him up on it.
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
I'm disproportionately drunk. But I also spelled disproportionately right twice so maybe I'm not that drunk
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
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